miércoles, 7 de noviembre de 2007

Recopilación de leyes estúpidas

Ha habido algunos comentarios por ahi de que este blog ya huele a muerto, y si, lo admito, lo descuidé bastantito, y suelo ser el tipo de persona que empieza algo y de rato lo deja morir, asi que si quieren que sobreviva este blogcito del pueblo y para el pueblo, dejen comentarios antes de que le de un plomazo a mi monitor.

Pues estaba Tony navegando la internet cuando se topo un articulo sobre una encuesta hecha en Gran Bretaña sobre cuales consideraban eran sus leyes existentes mas estupidas, y si de por si todos los sistemas de leyes son un tanto estupidos (o mas bien quienes las aplican) en cuanto a tantos rodeos, atajos, huecos, malinterpretaciones, y el hecho de ser redactadas muy confusamente al parecer a proposito para podernos sangrar a nosotros los ignorantes del sistema judicial lo mas posible y por si acaso encuentran a un politico haciendo algo indebido hacer que este encuentre una clausula escondida que lo ampara absolutamente de todos los cargos y hasta le gana dinero por contrademandar por difamacion o ataque a sus derechos humanos, encontre varias leyes que de plano pasaron de ser estupido comun y corriente, a estupido que pedo con eso?, a estupido te mamaste. Algunas se comprende el por que existen debido a su contexto historico, son leyes antiguas que nunca fueron eliminadas pero que alguna mas actual la revocó, y que en varios casos fueron redactadas en tiempos de guerra, y claro, existe una gran posibilidad que muchas sean falsas, para que nadie piense en hacer una de estas pend....
Sin más preambulos, ahi les va mi lista de favoritas:

Leyes Británicas:
  1. Es ilegal morirse en el parlamento inglés, esto es castigado con carcel.
  2. Es ilegal comer pay de carne molida en Navidad.
  3. Una mujer embarazada puede hacer sus necesidades donde ella guste.
  4. Si aparece la cabeza de una ballena muerta en la costa britanica, la cabeza automaticamente se vuelve propiedad del rey, y la cola de la reina.
  5. Es ilegal entrar al parlamento vistiendo armadura.
  6. Se condenara con penas muy severas a cualquier comun que permita que su mascota tenga relaciones carnales con alguna mascota de la familia real.
  7. Es ilegal estar a menos de 100 yardas de distancia del monarca en turno sin usar calcetines.
  8. No se puede colgar una cama por una ventana.
  9. Ningun niño menor de 10 años puede ver a un maniquí desnudo.
  10. Es ilegal dejar bolsas, maletines o equipaje desatendido.
  11. Recoger bolsas, maletines o equipaje desatendido es un acto de terrorismo.
  12. Una locomotora de vapor no debe superar los 4 km/h si es conducida por la calle y alguien debe caminar frente a esta con una bandera roja de dia o una linterna roja de noche.
  13. Es ilegal que un hombre orine en publico a menos que sea en la llanta trasera de su vehiculo y que tenga la mano derecha en este.
  14. Suicidarse es un crimen capital.
  15. Acostarse con el consorte de la reina es considerado traicion y es castigado con la muerte.
  16. En Chester, solo es legal disparale a un galés con arco y flecha dentro de las paredes de la ciudad y despues de medianoche.
  17. En York, es totalmente legal dispararle a un escocés con arco y flecha siempre y cuando no sea domingo.
  18. En Liverpool, es ilegal que una mujer tenga el pecho descubierto en publico a menos que trabaje como dependiente en una tienda de pescados tropicales.
Leyes de Estados Unidos:
  1. Alabama: es ilegal usar un bigote falso que cause risa en la iglesia.
  2. Alabama: poner sal en las vias de ferrocarril puede ser castigado con la muerte.
  3. Alabama: no debes tirar mocos al aire.
  4. Alaska: los alces no pueden ser vistos desde un avion.
  5. Alaska: esta prohibido despertar a un oso para tomarle una fotografia.
  6. Arizona: esta prohibido cazar camellos.
  7. Arizona: cualquier acto de mala conducta se tratara como ofensa criminal si se comete al usar una mascara roja.
  8. Arizona: los burros no deben dormir en bañeras.
  9. Arkansas: legalmente un hombre puede pegarle a su esposa, pero solo una vez al mes.
  10. California: ningun animal se debe aparear a menos de 1500 pies de distancia de una escuela, taverna, o lugar de culto religioso.
  11. California: ningun vehiculo sin conductor debe superar las 60 millas por hora.
  12. Connecticut: la policia te puede parar si manejas una bicicleta a mas de 65 millas por hora.
  13. Connecticut: para que un pepinillo pueda considerarse pepinillo debe de rebotar.
  14. Florida: si un elefante es atado a un parquimetro, en caso de multa se debe pagar como si se tratara de un vehiculo.
  15. Florida: es ilegal cantar en un lugar publico vestido en traje de baño.
  16. Florida: es ilegal tener relaciones sexuales con un puercoespin.
  17. Florida: es ilegal tirarse un pedo en un lugar publico despues de las 6 PM en jueves.
  18. Illinois: es ilegal comer en un restaurante que se este quemando.
  19. Illinois: es ilegal darle de beber whisky a un perro.
  20. Indiana: esta prohibido entrar a un cine o transporte publico si no han pasado mas de cuatro horas despues de haber consumido ajo.
  21. Iowa: los besos no deben durar mas de 5 minutos.
  22. Iowa: pianistas con un solo brazo deben de tocar gratis.
  23. Iowa: un hombre con bigote no debe besar a una mujer en publico.
  24. Kansas: es ilegal colocar nieve sobre un pay de cereza.
  25. Kentucky: por ley, uno esta sobrio hasta que se caiga.
  26. Kentucky: una mujer no puede comprar un sombrero sin el consentimiento de su marido.
  27. Louisiana: si alguien muerde a otra persona con sus dientes naturales, esto se considera un agresion simple, si se muerde a otra persona con dentadura postiza, esto se considera agresion agraviada
  28. Louisiana: es ilegal robar un banco y dispararle al cajero con una pistola de agua.
  29. Maine: se debe llevar rifles a la iglesia en caso de ser atacados por nativos americanos.
  30. Massachusetts: una vieja ley dice que es ilegal usar barba de chivo a menos que se pague un permiso especial para gozar de este privilegio.
  31. Massachusetts: es ilegal defecar en tu vecino en cualquier momento.
  32. Massachusetts: es ilegal poner tomate en la crema de almeja.
  33. Michigan: se da una recompensa de 10 centavos por cada rata muerta llevada a la oficina municipal.
  34. Minnesota: es ilegal conducir un automovil rojo en la calle rincipal en domingos.
  35. Nebraska: un padre de familia puede ser arrestado si su hijo no puede contener un eructo durante misa.
  36. Nuevo México: las mujeres tienen prohibido estar en publico si no estan rasurradas.
  37. Nuevo México: se castiga bailar alrededor de un sombrero.
  38. Nueva York: saltar de un edificio se puede castigar con la muerte.
  39. North Dakota: no se pueden servir cerveza y pretzels en un bar al mismo tiempo.
  40. Ohio: es ilegal emborrachar a un pescado.
  41. Ohio: es ilegal que mas de cinco mujeres vivan en una casa.
  42. Ohio: los dueños de tigres deben notificar a las autoridades si alguno se escapa en un periodo maximo de una hora.
  43. Oklahoma: se castiga con una multa de $5000 a cualquier mujer que le proponga una cita a un hombre a menos de que sea en lunes.
  44. Pensylvania: esta prohibido que la amas de casa escondan la mugre bajo el tapete.
  45. Rhode Island: es ilegal comprar un bote de basura manufacturado en Cabo Verde.
  46. South Carolina: es legal golpear a tu esposa los domingos por la mañana en los escalones del palacio de gobierno estatal.
  47. South Dakota: si hay mas de 5 nativos americanos en tu propiedad, les puedes disparar.
  48. South Dakota: si hay un grupo de 3 o mas nativos americanos en la calle se les puede considerar un ejercito y se les puede atacar.
  49. Tennessee: es ilegal pescar peces con un laso.
  50. Texas: es legal asesinar a alguien siempre y cuando le digas cuando, como, donde y por que.
  51. Texas: no puedes meterte la tela de los pantalones dentro de las botas a menos de que poseas 10 o mas cabezas de ganado.
  52. Texas: es legal dispararle a alguien si esa persona te da la pistola.
  53. Washington: es ilegal pescar peces tirandoles piedras.
  54. West Virginia: los niños no deben atender a la escuela si tienen aliento a cebolla.
Leyes Canadienses:
  1. Es ilegal mandar cartas o telegramas en los que se amenaze a un pajaro.
  2. Es ilegal matar a personas enfermas de un susto.
  3. Es ilegal pretender hacer brujeria.
  4. Cada quinta cancion en la radio debe ser cantada por un cantante nacido en Canadá.
  5. No se puede pagara un articulo que cueste 50 centavos con puras monedas de un centavo.
  6. Es ilegal matar a un sasquatch.
  7. En la Columbia Británica, los carceleros estan obligados a darle una cerveza a un deudor convicto si este la pide.
Si saben de alguna ley mexicana por el estilo mandenla, estoy seguro de que debemos tener varias cosas parecidas por algun lado.

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